There are so many things I want to tell my younger self. SO many! Especially my teenage self. Of course, I don’t think teenage me would listen or heed any advice that I gave. That’s just the nature of teenagers.
But at 20 years old specifically, I had just become mentally stable. I was on the other side of my ECT treatments and I was getting close to finishing my bachelor’s degree. Knowing what is ahead of me, I wouldn’t tell her to not take the job at the little Catholic school. Despite how much trauma I endured there, I would still take the job. But what I would tell her to do is start therapy and stick to it. She needs to heal from childhood trauma so that she can be better prepared to set boundaries and avoid what happens at that school. If she does that, I don’t think she’d stay there as long as we did. I think I still would have been a teacher, just at a different school. Who knows? Maybe I’d still be a teacher right now if my experience had been better.
Lots of ‘what ifs’ to ponder, but without a doubt, going to therapy a lot earlier and healing sooner would make a world of difference for us.
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