Daily Prompt Response—Notable Things

Considering it’s only 9:21 a.m. at the time of my response here, there hasn’t been a great deal of time for something notable to happen. That is, if the question is referring to notable things in my life, as opposed to Googling what has happened on this day in history. Considering myself, I can honestly say that so far, the most notable thing today is that I got some sleep. For the past several weeks, I have ridden the proverbial wave of happiness. I had so much energy and enthusiasm for doing absolutely everything. I compared myself to Leelee Sobieski’s character in the movie “Never Been Kissed” when she is asked about what her hopes and dreams are. She excitedly rattles off an entire list of things she wants to be…a poet, a painter, a potter…and she goes on. That’s how I felt. I almost felt frustrated because there was so much I wanted to do but I can’t do multiple things at once. I wanted to read all the books I’ve been wanting to read, but I can’t read while I knit. Because I also wanted to knit all the things. I also got back into running and have spent many mornings running through my neighborhood after my husband leaves for work. I would go to bed late at night and have a hard time either falling asleep or sleeping all the way through the night because of this almost manic kind of energy. I use the term manic because I am in fact bipolar. But I take medicine for it and only attributed this seemingly manic energy to feeling extreme elation that I was finally done with grad school and my time in a soul-sucking job was almost over.

I should have known that the feeling wouldn’t last forever. It never does. And I don’t think it would be healthy if it did. Over the past few days I felt myself slowing down and not having that same kind of inner momentum. Finally, yesterday, I felt pure exhaustion. It only seemed to get more intense the further into the day I went. So by the end of the day, while waiting to pick up our dinner order from a local Chinese take-out restaurant, I began to tear up. Literal tears that I had to wipe away so as not to draw attention to myself. I immediately began to try and analyze the reason for the tears. Was I frustrated that it’s taking so long to find a new job? Was I nervous about the fact that for the first time in 19 years, I won’t have a job after June 30th? It certainly felt like it could have been all of that. But once I got home and decided that I just needed to go to bed and get some sleep, I realized that the tears were simply a byproduct of coming down from the high I had been on. My body, to include my mind, was telling me that I need to rest. Not the kind of rest where I don’t run in the morning and do a whole bunch of other stuff instead. I needed sleep. So I went to bed and slept. When my husband left for work earlier than normal this morning, I let our dog out and afterwards, our dog and I slept on the couch for another two hours or so until I had to get up and get ready for work.

I still feel tired. And when I get home from work today I’ll probably rest again on the couch for a while. But I don’t feel the same exhaustion as yesterday. I almost feel a groggy kind of emotional hangover. That’s ok though because I finally got the sleep I needed, which, given how I’ve been recently, is very notable to me.