Do you set personal goals for yourself?
“Something Good” Sunday
Yesterday, I discovered that I had achieved a personal goal for myself that I didn’t know I had set.
Many years ago, when I was deep into my life as a Catholic school teacher, I saw a woman at Walmart. I wrote about her in my post The Doppleganger of My Dreams. It was a short post, so I’ve copied it here:
“To the woman I passed in the produce department at Walmart–I was instantly mesmerized by you. You looked to be about my age and the only difference between you and I was that you had a child in your shopping cart and I only had fresh vegetables. Your hair style was short, but not enough to be spiky. It was a white blonde with a blue tint swept up in a swirl on one side. I immediately noticed the tattoos all down your arms. I have tattoos. But they are not as expressive and confined to places on my body that can be easily hidden by clothing. Teaching in a private, religious school makes me timid about revealing too many of my tattoos at one time. The small sun on my ankle is about all I feel comfortable putting on display during warm weather. I was envious of your style. While I don’t think of myself as anything but beautiful the way I am, there is a part of me that wants to have a style that is uniquely my own.
I wish so badly that I had said something to you. After all, aren’t women supposed to build each other up? It made my day when the young girl at the McDonald’s drive thru said that the color I was wearing looked good on me, or when the pizza delivery lady said my hair was pretty. But you were on the phone and clearly in a hurry. And while I was fortunate to be able to take my time doing my shopping, I was not brave enough to even realistically consider complimenting you if you had not been on the phone. The same timidness that I feel about my appearance runs deeper into my heart, not allowing me to say what I truly want in the moment. Despite this, I want you to know, that had I been brave enough, I would have told you: “I love your style! I wish I had your look!” And I would have sincerely meant each and every word.
To the woman I passed in the produce department at Walmart–you inspired me.“
The woman I described became a goal of mine…subconsciously. I wanted to have her style, but realistically, I didn’t make it a goal. I never thought I coud look like her, so strong was my commitment to the stifling environment I worked in and devoted my life to.
Of course, we know now that I have indeed covered my arms with tattoos like that woman. I don’t have the white blonde hair with a blue streak in it, but I do what I can with styling my hair to make it fun and funky.
But here’s the thing, yesterday, I was at a work event and while I was there, I got into a conversation with another woman. We talked about work related things, and then as we wrapped up our conversation, she said that she loved my style. She waved her hand in front of me while she said it and then added, “I just, love everything.” Some people have previously complimented my tattoos, or my hair, or my glasses, but this is the first time someone has ever complimented my style.
For reference, this is what I looked like yesterday:
I was obviously deeply touched by her compliment. Her words affirmed in my mind that I had indeed become the doppleganger I saw in Walmart and dreamt about becoming. I achieved the goal I didn’t even know I had.
Want to help me accomplish my dream of being a paid writer? Buy me a coffee!
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